I haven;t done an unbound post in a while. Not like I don’t have things to freak out about, believe me, I do. Lots. I also have amazing things going on in my SL. But something happened this past week that made me realize, all the crap, the drama, and even the good stuff, the opportunities, mean absolutely nothing.
SL is a giant mind f*ck. Plain and simple. It is. We end friendships over the stupidest crap. We hold grudges, make people guess why we are angry at them or we don’t even tell them, we let them figure it out when we do the oh so mature thing and remove them from our profile. We partner and unpartner on a whim. Yes, for many on SL, it’s to do things that we don’t, can’t or are too afraid to do in RL. I was never one of those girls who partnered and unpartnered easily. In fact, I have only been partnered 2 times…the first for almost a year and now, to my sissy. I did what a lot of us do on SL and I unpartnered my partner in the midst of a hissy fit that would have put a hormonal premenstrual 15 year old to shame.
I have always lived my SL by this one creed, if you will…I have two lives, but one heart. If I care about you in SL, I care about you in RL. I care about the person behind the avi. I try to always remember that in the heat of the moment. I don’t always succeed. It is not something I am proud of, but it is something I do recognize about myself. I am only human. Much like in RL, we take for granted those people we see every single day in SL…just assuming that they will be there when we log on to our viewer or sign into Skype or Facebook or Yahoo.
This past week, I almost lost someone I love very dearly from SL. RL health issues, serious ones. Like a large majority of people, perspective hit me like a ton of f*cking bricks. So many things I thought were important, became so petty. During times I spent harping and bitching over things, that really are truly inconsequential, I realized I could have spent letting this person know how much he means to me. I could have spent time enjoying his company instead of being a stubborn hard headed New York Italian bitch.
Many of us on SL spend many many hours on it. We spend more time with these people than those in our RL, each for our own reasons, be it financial, health, anxiety, stay at home parents etc. For whatever our reasons are, these people are, for all intents and purposes, very much part of our RL’s. There are a few people who can turn off SL and then forget it and the people they interact with. There is nothing wrong with that or those people. But for many, including myself, that is not a reality.
I live my RL with the belief of never go to bed angry. Always tell the people you love them that you do. Pick your battles. Put things into perspective. For some reason, with SL, I have failed at that.
I guess what I am saying is this: People can be gone in an instant. In SL, we really just have our words. I wish I had used them more to speak about how i care about people instead of poison. I honestly do try to steer clear of drama, the operative word is TRY. But I have a mouth on me. and a temper, and i have ad/hd….so yeah. LOL. Not an excuse, just a reason…oh and the fact that I’m human as are we all.
Let those on SL know you care about them. Take a step back and breathe when in a fight and things are getting heated. Realize that compromise doesn’t mean caving in. Pick your battles.
And never log off angry.